Recently, I was hurt by someone I’ve known since childhood. Although I’ve always had a different worldview, I never imagined it would cause me to be ostracized by the people closest to me. I won’t go into the drama—it’s needlessly stressful and clichéd—but a few events have lead to me to feel that this person no longer wants me in her life, at least in any meaningful way. For a moment, I had the physical sensation that my chest had been hollowed out with a spoon.
At Peaceful Dumpling, we’ve shared effective strategies for dealing with toxic people and people who bring you down. I’d like to bolster our feel-at-peace arsenal with this guided meditation for when someone hurts you. This grew out of a mantra I found myself thinking as I lay in bed one evening, trying not to get caught in unproductive inner dialogue. While each situation requires a different approach—sometimes you leave a relationship, sometimes you work to repair it—this meditation is intended to address the immediate hurt we inevitably feel, regardless of our actions to come.
Finally, although time may be the ultimate healer, I feel better when I honestly face how I am feeling at that moment. I admit to doing major house cleaning this weekend as a distraction/therapy, but really acknowledging my pain has helped me the most.
Find a comfortable seated position. Sit in straight alignment. Relax into your body. Breathe deeply and slowly through your nose.
Say in your mind or aloud—
I see my wound.
I accept it.
It is okay to feel how I feel.
I don’t need to run from this feeling.
I don’t need to hold it closely.
As you breathe, notice any where in your body where you feel a physical echo of this emotional hurt. Do you experience an aching in your chest, your head, your hands? Imagine breathing warmth into that area, and recite:
I see my wound.
I accept it.
I allow it to guide me to beauty.
Inhale the grace of your life.
Exhale peace.
Recite:
I see my wound.
I accept it.
I dwell in a higher place.
I dwell in serenity.
Compassion is my guide.
With each calm breath, you are healing yourself.
With each breath, you take in the light of your existence.
With each breath, you release that light into the space that surrounds you and into the world.
Recite:
There is no right time for this feeling to dissolve.
There is no wrong time.
I accept this.
I dwell in a higher place.
May peace be with you.
Related: I Tried It: Zen Meditation Sangha
How to Deal with People Who Bring You Down
__
Photo: Mary Hood
